When It's Time for True Change

Episode Summary

Welcome to the first episode of the new year! Join Carla Reeves as she shares practical insights and actionable steps to help you embrace change, overcome fear, and create lasting transformation in your life. Whether you’re setting bold goals, navigating patterns that hold you back, or simply looking for more peace and alignment, this episode will equip you with tools to make 2025 your year of intentional growth.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

1. Recognizing When It’s Time for Real Change:
   • Signs that indicate you’re ready for a shift, such as feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or disconnected.
   • The power of listening to that inner nudge toward something more meaningful.
2. Navigating Fear:
   • Understanding fear’s role in the change process.
   • How to recognize and move through common fears, from fear of failure to fear of success.
   • Inspiration from Elizabeth Gilbert’s Big Magic on addressing fear’s repetitive and limiting voice.
3. Taking Aligned Action:
   • The importance of small, consistent steps toward your vision.
   • Viewing your goals as a place to act from, rather than a destination to reach.
   • How to sustain momentum throughout the year by nurturing accountability, habits, and focus.
4. Finding the Reins to Create Change:
   • Reclaiming your power and recognizing areas where you can take control.
   • Deciding whether it’s time to change external circumstances or grow internally.

Key Takeaways:

• True transformation starts within and is built on consistent, intentional action.
• Fear is natural and often signals growth—don’t let it derail your journey.
• Aligned action, patience, and small steps lead to sustainable change.
• Life’s bumps won’t disappear, but being equipped for the journey makes all the difference.

Resources Mentioned:

• Book: Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
• Explore Carla’s suite of personal growth tools and classes at carlareeves.com

Learn more about Carla:
Website: https:/www.carlareeves.com/
Connect on LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/reevescarla/
Connect on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@differentlythepodcast

Go to https://www.carlareeves.com/getunstuck.com to download Carla's on demand journaling workshop + exercise to help you stop spinning and start moving forward.

Explore Coaching with Carla: https://bookme.name/carlareeves/lite/explore-coaching

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Thank you for listening!

Chapters

• 0:01 Embracing Change
• 8:38 Nurturing Change and Taking Aligned Action

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

I'm Carla Reeves, and this is Differently. Whether you feel stuck in survival, navigating a change, or seeking more for your life, may this podcast be your weekly nudge to take a risk to build a life that is uniquely bold, authentic and in alignment with your deepest values. What if you worried less about the bumps in the road and instead got equipped for the journey? Get ready to rethink what's possible. Welcome, happy New Year. If you're new to the show, thank you for showing up.

Speaker 1: 0:36

I'm Carla Reeves, your host, and here we are if you're listening, live at the very beginning of a brand new year, which I love. Maybe in the past you've set New Year's resolutions. I want to invite you to do something different this year. Sometimes, those New Year's resolutions, they fizzle out by February, and I really want to inspire you and have you think about what it would look like to really think, feel and show up differently to your life this year. Maybe you have big goals that you already have your eyes on, or maybe you feel a deep need to make some real change this year. Maybe it's like a nine feeling inside of you that you've been wanting to ignore, or maybe it's just patterns that just keep showing up in your life where you know it's going to require something different of you this year. Today's episode we're going to dive into how to recognize when it's time for real, true change, how to navigate the fear that inevitably shows up when we're on the cusp of making some big change in our life or dreaming something big, and how to get into aligned action. If you guys have been listening for a while, you know that sometimes it's really easy to fall into thinking that our life will only change if the people in our life or our job changes, or all our external circumstances need to change in order for things to get better. And I want to just caution you to don't stay here, because there's so many things that you can shift within yourself to change your reality and your circumstances.

Speaker 1: 2:17

So let's talk a little bit about the signs that show up when, when it really is a sign for true change. Maybe you've been stuck in spinning in a certain place for a long time and now you're excited and you've got your eyes on something, a goal that feels really exciting and is kind of calling you forward. Maybe you've been stuck in negative thought patterns and when we have a big dream or we're setting out on a new year, those can go away temporarily because we're excited and we're going to create something new and we're going to change our actions. We're going to change our behaviors, maybe we're going to start a new habit, which those are all good things. But in order to make true change, you've got to make sure that you also address the underlying thinking and patterns that have derailed you before Another sign that you know it's time for true changes maybe you've been feeling stuck, overwhelmed, powerless for a while, and that's a terrible feeling like you have no control and it's a lie that gets in our head and makes us feel terrible.

Speaker 1: 3:17

Or maybe you're just been burned out and tired, because you're tired of like I was for years and years of trying to do more and be better and get better and all of that, and that cycle is exhausting. Those are all really good signs that it might be time for something different in your life. And maybe what's compelling you forward this year and you're excited about this new year is that you know in your heart there's something more, and sometimes we can get resigned about that, feeling like that's just really not true or it's never going to happen for us, and I want to encourage you to hang on to that. Hang on to that knowing in your heart. That is the very thing that two decades or more ago was what I held on to, to make some real change in my life that turned out, turned into being really a new way of living, a lifestyle um change. So hold onto that. It's important, it's there for a reason and it's something that you can start to align yourself to, to have more ease in your life, to find that experience, more balance in your life, to feel calm and on purpose again and have that clarity. Maybe it's that you just want to feel more peace in your day to day and more ease and flow, or maybe it's just that you want to have a sense of control, like you have influence to shape the quality and experience of your life. These are all such good things and the change that is needed to really build these into your lifestyle start on the inside. Okay.

Speaker 1: 4:57

So next let's get clear on the role of fear. I want to just normalize fear. On the role of fear, I want to just normalize fear this last year. I've spoken about it a little bit on the podcast before, but I really learned that one. I felt more fear, doubt and confusion as I planned and built out and kind of reset my business than I've ever felt. And what I learned in going through that is that I can get better at recognizing fear, at hearing it and the way that it shows up in my head, its voice and the language, and really choose in the face of it so that it doesn't continue to derail the things that I'm here to do. And I want to read you something from Elizabeth Gilbert's book Big Magic. It's about fear, she says.

Speaker 1: 5:50

Around the age of 15, I somehow figured out that my fear had no variety to it, no depth, no substance, no texture. I noticed that my fear never changed, never delighted, never offered a surprise twist or an unexpected ending. My fear was a song with only one note, only one word actually, and that word was stop. My fear never had anything more interesting or subtle to offer than that one emphatic word, repeated at full volume on an endless loop Stop, stop, stop, stop. Which means that my fear always made predictably boring decisions, like a choose your own ending book that always had the same ending Nothingness. I just love that she discovered it much earlier in life than I did, but I think that's the opportunity in front of us is that we don't have to let it derail us. But it's our job to shine a light on it and see if it's real and really pull it apart so that we can move forward in the face of it. And if you know it's time for change in your life, like real change and you feel scared, good, this is a sign that you're onto something, that you're moving in a direction, that you're stretching yourself, that you're getting out of your comfort zone and some of the.

Speaker 1: 7:19

I also want to read you some of the common fears that most often show up, just so that you can begin to start to recognize them. The fear of unknown and uncertainty about the future. We know that's going to be there. It's normal for all of us. Fear of failure, that we're going to do it wrong or make the wrong decision Ever felt that one? Fear of disappointing others or facing judgment I think this is sometimes the biggest one for me worrying about how it's going to impact the people around me. Fear of losing security or stability. Fear of not being able, not being capable or qualified enough. Fear of success or increased responsibility. I felt that too, at times where it's like, oh gosh, if I take my foot off the brake and this really starts to take off. Am I going to lose these other important parts of my life or is it going to be out of my control and I'm not going to have, say, and it's going to disrupt the life I actually want? And then fear of letting go of familiar patterns, even if they're not serving us, because, let's be real, sometimes those familiar patterns, even though they might be debilitating or negative, they sometimes are just comfortable because we've been there a long time, so know that this is all normal and that there are signs that you are moving.

Speaker 1: 8:38

I'm been watching my youngest son navigate some change in his life right now and he's making a big change in his path, like really finding his path for the first time. And I'm just noticing his process of moving through feeling excited and then feeling fear, and then we're just, you know, I'll tell him just take the next step, take the next step. And then he learns more and he gets more confident and I see him like he's standing taller as he's making steps and exploring this new path. And that's what we have to do too. We have to be gentle and kind of, guide ourselves and shine a light and face the fear and keep moving forward. Okay, so I want to give leave you with some reminders that one fear is natural response to change, that it's our job to shine a light and see if it's real that we get to choose.

Speaker 1: 9:33

Fear doesn't get to run our life unless we allow it to. We get to choose in the face of it and know that that voice in your head that talks you out of your heart's desires over and over and over again, that it is not on your side, it's not in your best interest, but it's going to be there and I think that's the important message is that we have to be prepared to walk through it and call on those confident, faith-filled, courageous parts of ourselves, and even sometimes looking back and taking an inventory of times where you called on that those parts of yourself and you move forward and what that felt like and what that led to is a really good practice. And remember you're in charge of the change. It doesn't have to happen all at once. Think of like a large ship in the ocean turning. It takes time, patience and consistent small adjustments. The captain doesn't just jerk the wheel, and I think that's something that we have to remember, too, that we make small intentional movements in that direction and over time, it makes that bigger turn that we're after. This can be done in small intentional steps, and the cool thing about that is that we don't have to wait for the big turn, till it's done, to actually start to feel some of an experience, some new and different things that I know you want to feel more this year. Okay, so the next thing I want to feel more this year Okay.

Speaker 1: 11:08

So the next thing I want to talk about is finding the reins to make change. Sometimes we get in a stuck spot where we just feel powerless, and I want to remind you that you are never powerless, and it's one of my favorite things in working with clients is helping them, you know, find the reins of their life again and the things that they can control to start to make change. So I want you to think about and you might even get out a notebook or a journal and just write down the places where you have power and control to start to move things in the direction that you're thinking about, and reminder that we tend to default that these things on the outside have to change first. That's a lie. So come back to what right now, given the exact circumstances that you're in, where do you have power and what can you start to begin to do? A question that I often ask my clients.

Speaker 1: 12:02

If you find yourself in a spot where you're grappling with making some kind of change maybe it's a relationship, or maybe it's a career change ask yourself is this a moment where I need to change it, meaning the circumstance, the job like leave the job or leave a relationship, or is it an opportunity to change you? Sometimes we need to grow and then the challenge actually gets smaller or changes. And sometimes, if we've made lots of attempts already to grow ourselves inside the circumstance or build qualities to overcome what is happening and there's still friction, sometimes that's a sign that it's time to move and it's actually there to move us, and sometimes we just spin our wheels here for way too long, and that's also a great indicator that it might be time to get some really good support to help you get out of the stuck, because you don't have to stay there. Life is way too precious and way too short. So this is what we do and I'm going to talk about that more later, but this is what we do we help people get out of this stuck spot and really equip you to make lasting change.

Speaker 1: 13:24

Okay, so the last thing I want to talk about is taking aligned action, and this is where you want to start, with small, manageable steps. You want to keep your eye on that vision that you set out for this year, that dream that's on your heart, and then align yourself today to that. So I love the saying that dreams are a place to dreams and goals are a place to come from instead of get to. So let that goal be a place to come from today, so it can guide you. How are you going to think today? How are you going to show up today? What are you going to focus on today that moves you in that direction? That's the key, because consistent, aligned action over time is what's going to move the needle in your life.

Speaker 1: 14:09

And this time of year, at the new year, I see people get so excited about their dreams, and I love that. I love the energy this time of year. I love the creativity, I love the inspiration. It's awesome. I don't want to change that. Don't change that, but what I do want to focus on is that have that, let that start a fire inside of you, but also have your eye on what's going to sustain you this year for the long term, to really see it through, because the qualities that you need in order to see it through are very different than the qualities of like getting started. And so what are those for you? What are those things that are going to help you stay accountable, help you walk through the fear, help you show up again and again with consistency, because that's what's going to make it happen for you. Some things I've seen in coaching hundreds of people over the years is that you need to want it, not doing it for someone else, but doing it for you. You have to keep showing up again and again and again and nurturing, keeping your eye on that vision and that dream, because that's what keeps the fire inside of you. So how are you going to keep that alive this year?

Speaker 1: 15:20

Next one is getting on the court and practicing. This is where it happens right, not in our heads, but in our actions and doing that on a consistent basis. So we get out of our comfort zone and we start to see some results and we build the confidence and then those tools to sustain it. What tools do you have? Maybe there's one habit you could take on this year that's going to help you sustain this.

Speaker 1: 15:44

Remember there's never a perfect time to make change. Make important change, start to do differently. It's really when you say yes is when everything will start moving in that direction and it starts working. When you say yes. I've seen this over and over and over again with clients that I've worked with. So, in closing, remember that true change isn't about having perfect clarity or feeling completely ready, because that doesn't often happen. It's about acknowledging where you are, choosing what you want and taking intentional steps forward, even in the face of fear, especially in the face of fear. I promise your future self will thank you for having the courage to begin.

Speaker 1: 16:29

I don't like to ask this question, but I know it's an important one. What happens if you do nothing? What happens if you don't make change? I think it's important that we look there, because if that's not an option for you, if that makes your heart sink, you have your answer. This is your year to do differently.

Speaker 1: 16:48

So I want you to take five minutes today and just tune in and think about what you want to create this year. Maybe you have that vision in your mind already. Maybe it's a mission you're on or maybe it's one word that you've chosen. Who will you need to be in order to realize that vision? How will you need to show up in your relationships, establishing healthy boundaries at work? How are you going to manage your time and attention? And what do you need in order to stay true to all of that and be consistent? Because, let's be real, that's what it takes. And remember, listen to that still small voice in the back of the room, in your mind, because it's and remember, it's not a condemning one, it's calling you to rise and move forward.

Speaker 1: 17:43

If you're feeling ready to really do this work, I want you to know that we have reimagined our suite of tools and offers and support for your journey this year. And whether you're looking to take a class, or you're looking to stay more accountable and on top of managing your mindset, or if you're ready to go deep with this work and really lay some solid foundation for making true, lasting change, we've got something for all of those stages of your journey. You can explore and check them all out at carlorevescom. Think of it as your personal growth toolkit. These are tools for your life and you know the bumps in the road aren't going to go away, but getting equipped for the journey makes all the difference. So we would love to support you. If you're not sure where to go, we can always hop on a call together and I'm happy to help you figure out what would be a great next step. Remember you don't have to figure it out all alone and that sometimes the bravest thing that we can do is just acknowledge that we need support or want support, and we're ready to do things differently Until next week.

Speaker 1: 18:59

Everyone, I'm Carla Reeves and this is Differently. Thank you for tuning in to this episode of Differently. It's been an honor to share this conversation with you. You know, one of the keys to living fully is to take action when you're inspired to do so. I hope you found that spark of inspiration today and would you help us spread the word? Did someone you know come to mind while you were listening? If this episode could impact someone you know, please share it and pass it along. New episodes drop weekly, so tap that subscribe button and join us next time as we continue to challenge the status quo and get equipped to live life differently.