Differently

What Gets You Out of Bed with Joel Stone (Encore Episode)

• Carla Reeves

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What gets YOU out of bed?

My guest on the podcast today, Joel Stone, has an incredible story that has fueled a very strong personal vision, and a sense of duty that causes him to show up to his life in a really big way.

Joel is an entrepreneur, best selling author, podcast host of Stay Hungry and speaker.  He is the co-founder of UK’s leading direct response marketing company, Codebreak.  His work has been featured all over the world and listed alongside other leading business figures and celebrities.

Get ready to be inspired with tangible take-aways around mindset, finding your own personal vision, overcoming anxiety, living a life of service, and more!

Grab a notebook because there are seriously so many gems in this one conversation.

Enjoy!

Learn more about Joel:  
https://www.codebreak.co.uk/


Check out his live, in-person events:
https://ffrbfifc4ood.swipepages.net/stayhungrylive

Connect on IG:
https://www.instagram.com/joelstone13/

Listen to Carla on Joel's Stay Hungry Podcast:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mindset-live-boldly-authentically-and-aligned-with/id1458523627?i=1000580595401

Learn more about Carla:
Website: https:/www.carlareeves.com/
Connect on LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/reevescarla/
Connect on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@differentlythepodcast

Go to https://carlareeves.com/free-class to get The Class schedule, sign up, and/or pass it on to a friend. Come hang out and learn with us for FREE!

Book a Complimentary Strategy Call with Carla: https://bookme.name/carlareeves/strategycall

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Thank you for listening!

SPEAKER_01:

A deep change in the way that we live requires a deep change in the way that we think. I'm Carla Reeves, and this is Differently. I don't know about you, but my favorite movies are the ones that tell a story of overcoming. My guest today shares just that kind of story. You're about to meet Joel Stone. I was recently on his podcast, and I knew right away that I wanted you to meet him too. Joel is an entrepreneur, a best-selling author, he's the podcast host of Stay Hungry. He's the co-founder of UK's leading direct response marketing company, Codebreak. His work has been featured all over the world and listed alongside other leading business figures and celebrities. However, beyond his accomplishments, Joel has an incredible story that has fueled a very strong personal vision, a sense of duty that gets him out of bed and causes him to show up to his life in a really big way, even when the mind and body would like to do otherwise. Can you relate? If you're not on the move today, grab a notebook. You're going to want to write some things down. Get ready to be inspired. He shares so many tangible takeaways around mindset, finding your own personal vision, overcoming anxiety, living a life of service. He talks about how something he was made fun of as a kid has turned into his number one business tool. And you guys, there is seriously so much more in this one conversation, but I will leave that to be a surprise. Hey Joel, welcome to differently. I'm super excited to have you here.

SPEAKER_00:

Thank you so much for having me. I'm excited to be here.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. So I got the had the privilege of being on Joel's podcast, Stay Hungry, and um and just like met him and decided I want to have you come on our podcast here too. Really excited to dive into this conversation. So why don't you give us a little snapshot of who you are, where you are, and what you do in the world?

SPEAKER_00:

Cool. So my name's Joel Stone. Uh I live in a sleepy town called Shrewsbury in the UK. And we have one of the UK's fastest growing marketing agencies. Uh I'm the I'm the co-founder. We're best-selling authors in the marketing space. We have a marketing coaching program that includes a lot about mindset and confidence and things like that. Uh, I speak from the stage, I have my own podcast, and yeah, I think that's enough.

SPEAKER_01:

I think that's enough. A sleepy town. That sounds so nice. I grew up in a sleepy town that's not so sleepy anymore. So a sleepy town sounds nice. And it has it always been that way.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, to an American, this is definitely a sleepy town.

SPEAKER_01:

So great. Tell us where where did this all start for you? I I always love the story behind the business because I I know there's so much there. So give us give us the story.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, so the actual business side. Um I'm a graphic designer by trade. I um studied graphic design at university, went into the design industry. I built up a great portfolio working freelance for for major agencies on big brands, and then the recession hit. And freelancers are very easy to let go of. And I trained to be an accountant. Why wouldn't you? Uh but but long story short, combining accountancy and graphic design is actually not that far away from marketing. Um, because you can handle the data, the numbers, understand margins, understand returns, and then use your creativity to create that spark. So um after qualifying as an accountant, I set up my own design agency, ran that very successfully for seven years, but the whole time was working with my now business partner on so many projects that it just got to the point where we had to merge because the overlap was confusing. And we created what is now Codebreak, and it's gone bananas.

SPEAKER_01:

Hmm. That's awesome. And so, but what's your personal like what's your personal story behind all this? What drives this for you? What sure gets you out of bed every day and inspires you?

SPEAKER_00:

So I I have like a really strong personal vision, um, which is to help people and have fun, and uh and our company mantra is stay hungry. Now, um the help people and have fun used to just be to help people, and then I found over time that I was helping a lot of the wrong people. Um, there's a lot of people out there that will accept help that and and act like they really need it and not value you. And so I was it wasn't much fun. It was actually I found it beat me up quite a bit, and so I was like, okay, how can I help people that really need it, but it'd still be fun? What one element of that is getting paid to do it, and but but the the other element is getting people who've got the right values are on the same wavelength as me. Because when you help them, they use it for the right reasons, they do good with that help. And so the the exponential impact of help people and have fun is the more people I help, the more people they can help, and the more people they can help. And over time, you know, we've seen like really dramatic results from that. Now that's born from our company mantra, which is stay hungry. Um, there's kind of two sides to that. The boring side is we had a client that um leased vans, and we built them a website, did a marketing campaign, and all their vans were gone. They they no longer had any vans available, and they came in for a meeting, and we were like, Oh, this is it. It's it's about to happen. They're gonna get a new depot, they're gonna get more vans, this is gonna explode. And they both came in, looked really pale, really scared, and said, We need you to stop whatever it is you're doing. This is too much. We liked it how it was before. We just want to calm it all down. Um, yeah, this relationship's over. And it was sort of in that moment I realised I can't work with people like that if they haven't got the fire in the belly to sort of serve people and make the world more exciting and better, they're not for us. So that that's the boring side of it, but but a story that that's really valid.

SPEAKER_01:

Um that it's a catalyst, right? It's a catalyst for something.

SPEAKER_00:

A massive catalyst. So now we really hyper-qualify our clients. The whole process, um, from the moment someone meets me to the moment they become a client is a qualifying process. They might not know it is they you know, if they're thinking, oh, a free consultation, that's nice, and oh, a kickoff meeting, that's nice. Um, but the whole time it's us, okay, is this person made of the right stuff? Can they can they keep up? Will they do as they need to? When we get them a hundred leads, will they follow up on all of those calls? And if we feel like they won't, it's a bad fit. The other side of this is I had a a very traumatic childhood. Um I grew up well, the the year I was born, three months before I was born, my father's brother committed suicide. Um, so I was born into trauma, and it's a hard thing to describe. And a really strange thing happened, but I also looked like my uncle that had just passed. So so I spent the first like when as soon as I started to understand things, the first sort of four or five years of my life. My dad, my grandmother all said, Oh, you look so much like your uncle. That was an awful pressure to carry. It was really weird. At the same time, my dad developed severe mental health issues, as you can understand. So he spent a lot of time in hospital, and my mum had to work multiple jobs to put food on the table, which is absolutely inspiring. And as you know, stay hungry for me is seeing my mum leaving the house early in the morning, not coming back till late at night, putting herself last for others. That's a a huge thing for me. Um, because I'd really like to help other people not have to do that, and then like a little bit on the side is I I really look forward to the days where I can just treat my mum now. That's a like it's it's really cool that I'm doing well enough that I can just do something nice for her.

SPEAKER_01:

Does she does she know that's part of your vision and story behind what you do?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, um, I was on another podcast quite recently, and they asked me who who most inspires me in life. And like I've got you know, some big hitters like I love Gary Vaynerchuk, um, you know, I got Nelson Mandela, Mohammed Ali, like I've got all these heroes, but no, no one gets close to my mum. And it's not like it's not like a mummy's boy thing, it's not it's not like I don't go crying to my mom, I'm very independent, but she has got like some sort of fire in her. She doesn't even know it, she's not like a business ambitious type. Holy moly, when things get hard, she is the person you want in your corner.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm a boy mom, and just to hear you talk about your mom that way, that's just so cool. And when you said, Joel, when you said like you were born into trauma, I too was born into a lot of grief. And like you said, what did you say? You said something like, you know, I I it's hard to explain what that is like, right? And even as a young infant, right? Like we embody some of that environment that we were born into. My I'm uh from a his, hers, and ours family. My mom had lost her first husband in Vietnam and had three young children, and met my dad and had me shortly after. And so they were all experiencing the grief of her husband and their father. And then I came into the world, and I feel like part of my work that I do in the world to uplift people comes from that. Um, because I think it was just like born in me to like make everybody feel better.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, you have like this like inbuilt anxiety and you don't know where it's come from. And um, like, you know, I've spoken to therapists, that's just a healthy thing to do. And and they're like, Oh, you know, you can choose not to be anxious. And the first time somebody said that to me, I was like, what are you talking about? This is like my default position. This is all I know because I was like so worried about making sure everybody else was okay, that the the fact that I felt completely frazzled didn't even register. And then when I learned that, I was like, oh, this is a power for good. I can use this. And here we are.

SPEAKER_01:

And here we are. Wow, that's a that's a really I've never heard it quite that way, right? I've heard you can choose to be happy and you know that you have choice in all these things, but I've never really heard it directly for feeling anxious or anxiety. And I think probably people listening, like that's just such a um, there's a lot of power in that to be able to change your your state of being. So give us a little bit of like from there to here, like what have been some of your challenges along your entrepreneurial journey? And I know you do a lot of work around mindset. Um I mean, I think I know why mindset is an important piece of the work you do, but take us a little bit deeper into that and the role that that plays in in your life and in the work you do with people.

SPEAKER_00:

Sure. So um the honest answer is I have to work on my mindset every day. Um if if you've been unfortunate to have a life of trauma, um you you will have to work on it every day. That that's but I've also know people who've had no trauma and um have been very fortunate and they equally need to work on their mindset every day because you meet people who've been very fortunate, and their trauma is that they've had no trauma, that their struggle is the fact that they don't know what it feels like to struggle, and that can really hammer their self-worth. So we built into our marketing program, into our coaching that you should journal. We built in that you should work on your mindset, that you should stay hungry, that you should have really important moral values that you impress on people, and if they don't keep to that, then don't work with them. And it just makes it so much easier to get out of bed every day. When you get out of bed and you think today I'm gonna really help somebody, or today I'm gonna do some good for the world. It doesn't really matter what goes wrong because your purpose is way bigger than paying the bills or putting food on the table.

SPEAKER_01:

I think serving other people and getting in other people's worlds is one of the greatest um uh mindset tools there is. Right. It's just getting out of your own head, right? I know there are days where I wake up and I'm like, oh gosh, I have coaching calls, and maybe I don't feel like I'm in the proper mindset to have this powerful conversation. And every time I go into that conversation and just get completely in somebody else's world, I leave the call and I'm like, wow, I feel like a different human being.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I love that. So a real key thing, I think, for anybody listening is when you've got like your vision and your purpose nailed and your values around that nailed down, it gives you a sense of duty that you didn't know you could have. Um, and that sense of duty is such a driver because if you wake up one day and you've got a real bad headache, or you wake up and you're riddled with anxiety, the sense of duty will override that feeling, and you get stuff done anyway. And like I've got clients in a WhatsApp group at the moment, and I'm giving them a little bit of a hard time. We've I've set them a task called 10 before 10, where they have to make 10 calls before 10am every day, and uh like it gets to quarter to 10 every day. How many calls have you made? And I all the excuses start rolling it, and it's like, well, I've made 27 calls, I woke up with a headache, I've had a nosebleed, and uh I've heard that my mum's best friend's just passed away. What's your issue? And we just it's like you've got to have that sense of duty.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. So, how how did you find that for yourself? And how do you help other people find that?

SPEAKER_00:

Um, for me, uh so the other things happened around my dad um growing up. He tried to take his own life. Um then I lost my best friend to suicide when I was in my late teens. Uh, and now my dad's in prison because the mental health system here is not great, and he's kind of fallen into the wrong side of the system. Um, that meant that I had my own mental health issues, struggled with anxiety, struggled with depression. So my option is serve people, fulfill my duty, fulfill my vision, um, do everything I can to make a real impact in the world, or feel like crap, and I know which one I prefer.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. So take us back to getting clear on that vision, though. How did you how did you know your vision was to like serve help and help people and help people, you know, be happier, better? Like, how did you get how did you crystallize that for yourself?

SPEAKER_00:

There's there's been a couple of things. So one was I uh naturally like helping people, and I kept getting that whole like nice guys finish last like voice in my head. So I'd help someone out and then end up having to stay up late to do my own things, or I'd help somebody out because they said they've got no money, and then they drive past me in a sports car, and these things kept happening, and I and I was really getting down about it, and I was like, but I really like helping people, and this is this is like crushing. It's this is like maybe the world is just a horrible place, and and uh and I need to start playing the game, and then I just couldn't accept that. I I couldn't I couldn't give in to that, I just was not willing to to live that life. I thought, no, I don't I don't want it to be a grind, and I don't want to feel like everything is a chore and a task that has to be ticked off. I want it to be a joy, and so I was like, right, okay. I spoke to my business partner and and he agreed, he he comes from a very different background, but he's experienced different things to me that that got him to the same place. Um we were like, okay, well, what's the core thing we like doing? Helping people, uh and what's the worst thing about helping people? Well, when it isn't fun. So hey, so what should we do? Well, we'll we'll help people and have fun. If it doesn't tick those two things, we're not doing it. Now I'm not saying we always get it right, but nine times out of ten we do. And the best part about coming to work now, running a business, is it's fun. It's a joy. I I I get a real buzz out of it. And if you come to our office, it's not like other offices. I mean, it's not Google, but it's it's pretty cool. Um you know, the music's usually pump in, you can play pool, there's a drinks fridge, you can get some sweets, it's the sofas, there's a podcast studio, it's it's a different experience. And then my friends take the Mickey out of me. They send me messages saying, Oh, you're playing pool today again. Uh and I'm like, Don't be jealous. And and uh, so that's in a nutshell, that's where I wasn't really a nutshell, but that's where that story comes from. Um the the the like core values thing is everything that props that up.

SPEAKER_01:

Say more about that.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, so we have like a strong set of values um that we just never stray from. So stay hungry is one of them, impressed with results is another one, because uh in our industry, marketing, uh a lot a lot of marketing companies get accused of being all fluff. Um and we can't. That's I mean, like our emblem is a dinosaur. Or there is zero fluff about what we do, it's it's it's about getting results for people, and when you get people results, that's when they feel like it's fun, so it's important. Um other things that we do, um, one of our values is own your shit, and uh basically it's all about ownership and accountability, and that comes from me, and the reason that comes from me is because when I felt mentally at my worst, the best way to get control of that is to take ownership of it, and and it's the hardest thing to do when you feel like that. But if I can demonstrate that, then when I'm asking someone in our team to make sure our Facebook ads are all spelt correctly, not too bad. It's not not too much of a challenge. Um so yeah, our our values encompass everything that we do, they're really important to us. They're the way that we interview new recruits, they're the way that we interview new clients, they're the way we interview new suppliers. It's all part of it.

SPEAKER_01:

That's so powerful. Do you find that you that vision and values also is a compass in your personal life? I imagine.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah, to the annoyance of my wife sometimes. So she's like, Oh, why are you being so direct about that? I'm like, well, because it's obvious. Let's just get it done. Um or like um, one of our values is start with why, which is actually borrowed from Simon Sinek's book. Um one like I say why quite a lot at home. Some like somebody asked me to do something, why? And if they can't give me a good reason, it's not happening. Andy, my business partner, says because. So in the same way, they'll be like, Oh Andy, can you take the can you take the rubbish out? Because and um, yeah, it but it's made my relationship with my wife better. She understands me better because she's like, Oh, okay, they're your core values. If I ask you to do something outside of those, it's not gonna happen. So I know what I'm working with. And then she also understands why I get upset because I have a real um my trigger is injustice. I really struggle with like social injustice, all that, you know, um sexism, racism. It it fires me up. Um, because I hate that feeling of when the good guy is getting beaten up for being a good guy, or you um, and it's really helped that she can see that, and then she sees it in business as well with me now. She's like, Oh, you know that person's gonna screw you, don't you? And uh I'm like, Well, what makes you say that? And she says she'll say a few things, and I'm like, okay, that's good to know. I'll move towards them with love and see what happens. And she's normally right. They're they're they're like, they're after something, and once she once she get that, it's like, okay, fine, we're not doing business together. Bye.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I find in the face of just my own humanity that having vision and values are like, it's kind of like these pillars that I can hold on to, right? In the face of you know, the headache or not feeling like doing something or not being feeling inspired or energized to do something, that that vision or that commitment and those values are what allow me to act in the face of feeling otherwise, right? Like I learned a long time ago through my writing that if I follow my feelings, I'm never gonna get anywhere fast. I better know what I'm committed to and what you know I value and what I'm standing for. Because, like you said, that's what's allowed me to do anything in my life, to stand for a great marriage, or to stand for a business, or to stand for sharing a message when I was shaking in my boots and didn't want to get up and speak, right? I did it because of that bigger vision that you're talking about, and that's what allowed me to show up in my life over and over and over again. And it sounds like that's true for you too.

SPEAKER_00:

I love that. Yeah, so I've been doing a lot of reading recently about how motivation's not a real thing, and that actually motivation is a is a severe sense of purpose, and so you meet people who it doesn't matter if it's raining, snowing, blowing a hurricane, they still go for their run every day, and you're like, What why do you do that? Like, why why are you doing that to yourself? It's like because I've got to. I have to. And it's like that's not motivation, that's not it's not the same thing. It they don't wake up excited to go out in the snow, they wake up and do it because it's a non-negotiable, it's part of their purpose. And I I like I'm getting there with that. Um certainly I'm I'm there with the business, but yeah, there's so many inspiring people out there that do that, and then the other thing that I see with this, and Tony Robbins talks about this, is happiness is progress. So I I really struggle with the idea of happiness because I think happiness, as media and society tells us, is that endorphin rush, that spike of excitement, and actually that that's quite dangerous because on the other side of that is the is the down. And actually, when you look at the people who are the most kind of content with life and fulfilled, they're not running around like they're really excited, they're they're quite calm, and that's why impressed with results is one of our values. It's it's when you can show people that they're making progress, it makes them feel fulfilled, and when they feel feel fulfilled, they're truly happy.

SPEAKER_01:

I really resonate with that because um I think that ha happiness is it's like it's this thing we feel like we need to have more of in our life, but I've found in my own life that what you're talking about, contentment or fulfillment, is much more sustainable and isn't so contingent on the outer world, right? And like what's happening in your life for me, yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, exactly. That so I and I don't want to get confused with joy. I'd never take joy from people, that kind of overwhelming feel of joy, you know. When you I don't know, when you meet like I had it recently, I met my nephew for the first time, and it was just like this is lovely. But that what it wasn't happiness, it was joy. That ability to feel content and at peace with the world, no matter what's going on around with you, is incredibly powerful in business and in personal. To be able to control your energy, know that life as it is right now is pretty good, and and not get carried away is is a real skill. So it has to be something that has to be practiced every day, but it makes such a difference to how you see the world.

SPEAKER_01:

So I remember when you and I were talking on your podcast that you we talked a little bit about confidence, and you said, you know, the secret to confidence is really realizing that nobody has it. So say a little bit about that, and how does that tie into the work that you do, or does it tie into the work you do with people?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, so yeah, I truly believe that the most confident people you meet aren't confident, they're proficient, they're they're practiced, they've done it time and time again, and so it doesn't feel uncomfortable for them anymore. If you meet somebody who is cocky about something, you know, those people who are like, Oh, I'll be good at this when they've never done it before, and then they fall flat on their face. You don't want to be that person, it's it's not it's not a good look. It's it's that whole like I don't know who said it, but it's like it took me 10 years to become an overnight success. That statement of actually when you see someone on stage who really controls the crowd well, are speaking to 400 people as if they're just speaking one-on-one in a room, they've got everybody engaged. That's a skill that they've practiced over and over and over again. It's just that you didn't get to see all the times they were awful. So, in our business, that's so important. So, with our Done Few clients where we handle campaigns for them, I'm very clear. Look, we're gonna have to test and measure here, we're gonna have to see what works and what doesn't. And a few people say, Oh, well, you're a marketing company, surely you know. I'm like, Well, yeah, I've got I've got a really good idea of you know, we're gonna be pointing the needle in the right direction, but we still need to test and measure. And it's like, okay, so what am I paying you for? It's like, well, you're paying me to make sure we go in the right direction to start with, not we're not starting from ground zero. And in on the coaching side, it's about making people understand how much work you need to do at the front end to get the result you want at the back end, and very few business people become entrepreneurs because they don't understand that key bit.

SPEAKER_01:

Say a little bit more about that.

SPEAKER_00:

So, uh, a really easy analogy on that would be if you were doing sales for your business and you made five sales calls and you'd never done sales calls before, and you get off and you're like, right, sales doesn't work for me. I've tried five, didn't make any sales. And then you go down the road and you talk to another business owner, and they're like, Oh, how'd you get on with sales? And they say, Well, for every hundred calls we make, we make two sales, so we need to figure out how we can make more calls. And the first business owner goes, Oh shit, I quit after five. And you see that time and time again in business. Oh, I've done three posts on Facebook and nobody engaged, so I'm never doing it again. Or I've recorded 10 podcasts and I didn't get to number one, so I'm done. Or I launched a new marketing campaign and I only got four leads, so we're never going to do marketing again. It's crap. It's just not how life works. It's the people that are willing to go through that uncomfortable phase and push beyond it that succeed. Occasionally someone gets lucky, but that that's one in a hundred, don't worry about it.

SPEAKER_01:

Do you think that's like a inherent in like that entrepreneurial spirit? Because I I don't I as you described that moment of like, you know, making those five calls or making those posts and then being discouraged. Like I've gone through that over and over and over again in my business in different ways, right? And I don't know that I ever really thought about like I'm gonna keep going and this is what's required, but it just was like this relentless spirit in me that just keeps I just keep signing up for you know to go through it again.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and keep signing up for failure, yeah. I get it. Uh what is that? One of our clients, one of our clients texts me today and said, How do you keep winning? And I said, Because I'm failing more than you. And he's like, What do you mean? I was like, I am failing all over the place to get these wins. Uh, you know, I'm getting not getting enough sleep, um making calls where people swear at me, I'm getting trolled on social media. I'm recording like last night I recorded a podcast with someone who I'm pretty sure is clinically insane. It's like I am failing left, right, and center to win. And they were like, well, why don't you just give up? That sounds brutal. I was like, Yeah, but the wins are so good.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, that's awesome. Okay, so I want to talk about one but one kind of last thing so we can wrap. I know that you journal every day, you told me you journal every day, and I'm fellow journaling junkie, and I'd love to have you share, especially I think coming from a male perspective, like how how long has journaling played a role in your life? How does it support you and your your mindset, your life, your business?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. So I actually journal twice a day now, which is a bit of a new thing. So the morning journaling is ticking. Um, I kind of like write down what mood I'm in, um, how I'm feeling, what kind of physical feelings I've got too. Uh, and then I'll write down three things that I'm gonna achieve today, three things I'm grateful for, and then kind of just 10 minutes of writing down what's going through my head. The bit at the end of the day now is checking in on the things I said I was gonna do. So holding myself accountable, and also writing down anything I'm worried about because once I've got it down on paper, it's out of my head. Uh, and then the final bit is crossing out any of the ones that I can't control. So then when I wake up the next day, I can look at the things I can control and see what my action points on those are. Um, that's kind of in a nutshell what I do for my journaling. The reason it was actually it was born more out of personal than it was out of business, it was born out of trying to take control of a brain that was racing off in all directions, like anxiety, stress, uh, depression, um, kind of hyperactive thinking in terms of not being able to relax. And journaling gave me a place to kind of pull that all in and also make sense of my thoughts. I think there was a stage in my life where my thoughts controlled me, and I needed to get to a place where I controlled my thoughts, and journaling gave me that. Over time, it's become an unbelievable business tool because I'm stating my intention every day. And when you state your intention to yourself, you become dangerous. It's it's like today, like this morning I had a sales goal that I that I really wanted to happen. Some people call it manifestation. I I'm not sure if that if that's what it is for me. I just have to have that level of intent. And I was thinking about it, and I remembered when I was a kid, um, I was quite a good athlete. I was good at soccer, I was good on on the track, and I remembered that I used to visualize winning or visualise scoring a goal, like, and distinctly imagine it as if it was a reality. And then I was like, why did I stop doing that? Like that's like and and I remember why I stopped because people used to say things to me, and we have I don't know if this is a phrase in in the States, but away with the fairies. So they'd say, like, oh, your head's always in the clouds, you're away with the fairies, like, what are you doing? And um I was like, and so it became a negative that I used to spend time, which I now know was kind of meditating and visualization, on focusing on what I wanted to achieve because people thought that I was procrastinating, and now I do it, and it's the number one tool in my business.

SPEAKER_01:

Wow. Have you been doing the twice-a-day journaling for long enough to be able to say like what impact that's having or how that's different than one time a day?

SPEAKER_00:

The reason I started the second half of it was when your business gets bigger, you uncover bigger problems. It's it's uh that's kind of the nature of being in business, and I could feel some of the anxiety starting to seep back in. Some um, you know, I'm I'm a long way outside of my comfort zone now. Um, and that's that's fine, that's kind of what I signed up for. But sometimes I just need to write that stuff down, get it out of my head and get it on paper. The uh the other bit, which I think you mentioned about from the male perspective, why do I do this? And I th I think it's an entrepreneurial trait, not just a male trait. I am like insanely competitive. Do not play a board game with me because I'm not fun. Oh like it if I lose and I manage to stay present and keep my manners, I've done really well. It's like I'm not the guy to take to a pub quiz, I'm not the guy to play a board game with, don't get cards out because if if I come second, yeah, if I come second, I might as well have come last. And that that again, that was another one of those things that people tried to drum out of me. They were like, you can't be that competitive, you can't want to win that much. And it's not it's not just about me. I I want other people to win that much too. If you're if I'm in your corner, I want you to win so much it hurts. And and people told me that was a bad thing, and it's taken me until like my mid-30s to realize that's not a bad thing. It that that is a tool for good.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, it's so awesome. It is, it's like, why does it take us so long to learn to just like go with our natural rhythms instead of fight against them and feel like we have to change them, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, and I I also love this idea of it, sounds like you have learned to support yourself really well when you're dealing with something new, or you're like you said, your anxiety increases, or you've got bigger problems in the business, that you you know how to bring in the proper support or tool to take care of your own mental well-being. And I think that is really so important as an entrepreneur, as just a human being, really.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I mean, I think like at last count, I've got seven paid for mentors or coaches. I obviously I journal every day, I read self-help books, I try to exercise as much as I can. That's my weakest point, but it's getting better. I eat very mindfully because the fuel I put in dictates how well I perform. It's almost a full-time job to make sure that you're performing as well as you should be, and you owe that to everyone.

SPEAKER_01:

It's work. I mean, it really is. I think about that in my own life. Like living mindfully and intentionally is it's a lot of work. It takes a lot of diligence. Um but the like you said, I think early on, it's like, well, we can do that, or we can have this other life where everything is sort of running, wreaking havoc everywhere and kind of running in chaos. And like, yeah, I'm gonna choose this kind of work versus that kind of work.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. And it doesn't take long to slip, it's that like, and we all do it. I'm not I'm nowhere near perfect on this. But like, if you've ever had problems with weight, which is something I can relate to, if you try to change your lifestyle, and I'm avoiding the word diet on purpose, but if you try to change your lifestyle and then you kind of break the new rules and have a pizza, and then you're like, Oh, I've had a pizza, so I might as well have a burger. Oh, I've had a burger, so I'm gonna have some cheese. And then it'll take you like a month to get back to where you were before. So actually, it's like, okay, everything in moderation. How do I get this to a place where I'm in control, it doesn't control me? And like for me, it's food. For some people, it's alcohol, for some people it's drugs, for some people it's gambling, for some people it's business. It's yeah, you you have to, it's like you have the tail doesn't wag the dog.

SPEAKER_01:

As we close, and I want you to share a little bit about your work and where people can find you. But before we do that, if somebody's listening and they're just getting started on all this, right? It can feel so overwhelming. You clearly have been through a lot and walked this in your own life. Like, where what would you? Tell someone to start.

SPEAKER_00:

I think a big one to start with is to get comfortable with your own company. Learn to love yourself. Because until you've got that sorted, you can't do any of this stuff. And and you'll never have it completely sorted. But until you're comfortable with yourself, you can't build relationships, you can't build businesses, you can't take on challenges that feel impossible. It's you won't have the self-worth required to do it. And that applies to everybody. And then the other thing is to remember that whatever it is you're going through, somebody else has already been through it. So there will be a book or a resource or a website or a coaching program or a counsellor or a therapist that can help. And you will be surprised how affordable that is for whatever stage of business you're at. The return on investment from that kind of thing is 10x easy. So it's an easy conversation to have with yourself.

SPEAKER_01:

So good. In the work you do in your company, like I just in this conversation, I feel like I've gotten such a better perspective of what you do. And the feeling I have is that when somebody works with you, they're getting so much more than marketing. So tell us a little bit about how people can find out more about what you're doing and maybe something you're really excited about inside of your life and business.

SPEAKER_00:

Cool. Best way to find out more about what's going on with us, check out codebreak.co.uk or hook up with me on socials. I'm on Instagram, LinkedIn, TikTok, Facebook, the usual places. Search Joel Stone. I'm the guy with the glasses that looks like this. So if you're listening, I'm the guy with the glasses that sounds like this. Um something I'm really excited about at the moment. So we've just started doing our own live events. We host it in this amazing suite in a hotel in the middle of the UK. People fly in from all over to come to it. It's it's kind of boutique-y workshop based, so it's never gonna be huge. There's only 20 seats each time we do it. We do it once a month. It's called Stay Hungry Live. I'm just so excited. We've done one so far, and the feedback was immense. It's marketed as a marketing day because that's how I get people in the room. When you get there, there's there's mindset, there's kind of therapy, there's purpose, there's marketing, there's amazing food and drink. It's I'm so hyped about it because it lets people see behind the curtain.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, it sounds like you're feeding them all kinds of good, awesome stuff.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yeah. It's meant to be just crazy fun.

SPEAKER_01:

So when is the next one?

SPEAKER_00:

The next one's on the 27th of October, um, 18th of November after that, and then the 6th of December. So if if you're keen, if you're listening, and this sounds like a bit of you, just reach out to me on socials and I'll get you there.

SPEAKER_01:

That's awesome. Oh my gosh, Joel, like what an honor uh to hang out with you and your your just honesty and your realness is just it's so good. You just shared so many gems, and I'm so grateful that you came on to uh I'm just glad my listeners got to meet you, and I thank you again for having me on your podcast and would love to you know collaborate in other ways. You're an awesome.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I can see that I uh I feel like that's gonna happen. I've like I've loved getting to know you. I've I'm really grateful. I've been on the podcast, and I can't wait to see what comes next.

SPEAKER_01:

Awesome. Thank you so much. Have an awesome day, everyone. Thank you for tuning in to this episode of Differently. Hey, if you're ready to stop circling the same thoughts and start creating real momentum, check out my coaching experiences. There's a 12-week experience for a big shift, or there's a monthly writing and coaching partnership for ongoing clarity, creativity, alignment, and momentum. You can find all the details at Carlareeves.com. And if you enjoyed this episode, please help me grow the podcast and leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts and share with someone you love. Until next time, stop surviving your life. Start creating it.